The Sermon to the Tourists
2.
When
I see them, I immediately realize that I
cannot let the opportunity to speak to them go unexploited. So I proceed to jump and stand
on the back of a nearby donkey, despite the protest of his owner, I balance myself with
relative ease, and I begin to address the tourists and the rest of the crowd in English,
today’s unquestionably holy language. The diplomat
and others will translate what I say into Arabic, I am sure, for the benefit of my crowd
of highly interested locals.
3.
“What is it that you seek here, o modern-day pilgrims, travelers and
discoverers? The East offers no more new knowledge these days. And there is no salvation,
nor inspiration, in the past, if the past is indeed what you are searching for.
4.
“You can probably learn much more about the East sitting in the
comfort of your homes nowadays. But if you are here to get a feel, a real feel of
how things are in these parts, know then that getting a real feel of our misery and shame
may not be such a good idea when you cannot offer us any help, when we may not be able to accept or even want your help.
5.
“If you are soul-searching, search no more. The truth about the world,
life, and human destiny has always been known and clear, though often ignored or
forgotten; you are more liable to find it back home than here, all you have to do is open
your eyes and be honest with yourselves.
6.
“If you are searching for strength, know that you cannot find strength
among the weak.
7.
“If you are looking for amusement, pray tell me, what sort of
amusement do you expect to find in a such a
miserable place? Unless you be sadist, or even masochist.
8.
“And if you are scavenging for yourself,
for love, fulfillment, or belonging, scavenge no more. Such things always elude you when
you look for them, and fall right in your lap when you don’t.
9.
“Embrace life, love your fellow man, and go home. You can’t find
what you are looking for here. You can’t even find friendship here. And how can
you? How can you find friendship among people who still don’t know how to
befriend each other, or their door-to-door neighbors?
10.
“Remember, exceptions do not obliterate the rule. And bear in mind the
following advise: the friendly manners of the East hide behind them much fear and
suspicion. Do not be fooled. Do not be fooled. Adieu.”
11.
When
I finish my sermon, which has not failed to anger many of the shop-keepers I notice, and
which will later anger the Minister of Tourism himself I am sure, I jump off the
donkey’s back much to the delight and
relief of his owner. And as I continue my plunge into the darkness of the suq, I notice
that many of the tourists choose to leave the obviously
disgruntled rug-salesman and follow me.
12.
They
are hopeless, hopeless, those creatures of habit and undying curiosity. I knew
I could count on their hopelessness. Remember, I am just a Syrian messiah.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
lust for salvation, Brother, as though it were a woman, and I - a man.
|
